Certainty
by sound and sense
Summary: What really throws Donna off is hearing Amy ask the question out loud.  It's like because she's hearing it anywhere else but in her mind, she suddenly understands the depth of what it really means.


_Author's note: Quick drabble about one of our favorite Josh and Donna moments - or maybe not - in season four. Probably overdone, but this is my quick stab at it. By the by, anyone else pissed that Sorkin basically handed this on a platter to us as he left and then Wells ultmately did next to nothing with it in season five?_

_Reviews are greatly appreciated._

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><p>"Are you in love with Josh?"<p>

Donna doesn't freeze, or falter, or feel her world stop spinning when she hears Amy ask. Truth be told, she's not even the least bit surprised by the question. They had been discussing this very topic in round about ways all day; if surprised at all, Donna just can't believe it took her so long.

The problem was that Donna wasn't quite sure what her answer was. She had been mentally preparing herself all day, approaching different ways as to how she would handle the situation. From the outside looking in she knew how it appeared - she knew the rumors and the talk, but most of the time she chalked it up to boredom and ultimate lack of interoffice relationships in the West Wing. She didn't even bother to take it seriously because that topic of conversation was uncharted territory for her. She liked things the way they were – the last thing she wanted was to have an epiphany about "her feelings" and start acting differently towards him. There was enough drama already working in the White House; she didn't want to up-heave the system.

Donna could see what it looked like. Really, she could. Sure, she and Josh had a relationship that really wasn't common among assistants and bosses, or rather, senior assistants and Deputy Chief of Staffs. And yeah, she knew quirky little facts about him, such that he liked to wear blue shirts on Wednesdays, or that he absolutely hated going up to the Hill because it meant he had to actually _walk_ and leave the building. She knew how he liked his burgers, how he wasn't the most graceful person when it came to walking in the snow or new shoes - but honestly, working long and difficult hours with him twenty feet away for five years does that. You start realizing things about your boss whether you want to or not.

At least, that's what Donna tells herself.

What really throws Donna off, however, is hearing the question asked out loud. It's like because she's hearing it anywhere else but in her mind she suddenly understands the depth of what it really means.

To be in love with Josh would be a problem. And not just a small one, either. Besides the fact that this was the _White House_ and he was her _boss_, it was crazy. He was about ten years her senior, brilliant in politics and just - why would he ever be interested in her anyway? She was from Wisconsin and had no college degree and worked as an assistant on a budgeted salary every week. And here was Amy, intelligent and confident and so mesmerizing - Donna looked down at her shoes that she purchased thirty percent off at an outlet.

She suddenly thinks that's all the comparison that's necessary.

In a way, she kind of hated Amy for even suggesting it. She definitely knows it's all she's going to be thinking about the rest of the night, and Donna just doesn't know if she could handle this sudden whirlwind of emotions that seemed to storm her way like a hurricane. It would be weeks, now, maybe.

But in another way, she could see why Amy would ask. Josh had been her boyfriend, and Donna thinks that if she were in her position she'd be wary of herself, too. She was his assistant - _just _his assistant - and she appeared to know more about him than his own girlfriend. It wouldn't sit well with her, and Donna realizes she can't blame Amy at all. All she can do from the sidelines is sit and watch and understand. She has no place getting in the middle of this. Not really.

In the end, Donna doesn't offer a reply, but instead closes her planner and heads over to the file cabinet.

They both know the real answer, anyway.


End file.
